Spending My Last Night with It

Tonight is the night that I will spend my last with my tonsils. I’ve been planning to part with it since last year.

It’s sad to lose a part of you that you’ve been with since you were born. We’ve been through a lot of things- from every sore throat to every cough, from a multitude of ice cream flavors to gallons of hot coffee. It was there when I uttered my first word; it was there when I said “I do” at the altar.

But I have to let it go. For the past 26 years, it has been fighting a losing battle against bacterias; in the first 12 years of its existence, it has been effective in combating bacterias entering the mouth. Battered and beaten, my tonsils cannot anymore handle the stressful job of meeting every bacterium that comes its way. It fell to tonsillitis many times over; my heart now worried of the dangerous side-effects that its combat loss to bacteria may bring.

Tonight, we’ll sleep together; my enlarged tonsils causing the regular snores, as usual. Tomorrow, when I wake up from the operating room, after the procedure, we may see each other again; me looking at it, inside a small jar.

And from then on, my wife would probably appreciate sleep better, with my enlarged tonsils out, and the silence of the night, in.

Posted by: Allan

Featured Car of the Week

2005 Mercedes Benz SL65 AMG

Specifications:
MSRP: US$182,820
Engine: AMG-built twin-turbocharged 5,980-cc SOHC 36-valve V-12
Net power: 604 hp @ 5500 rpm
Net torque: 738 lb-ft @ 2,000 - 4,000 rpm
Compression ratio 9.0:1
Fuel and Ignition System: ME 2.8 engine management. Integrated sequential multipoint fuel injection and phased twin-spark ignition includes individual cylinder control of fuel spray, spark timing and phase, and antiknock. Electronic throttle. Two high-energy ignition coils and two spark plugs per cylinder.
Intake System: Twin-turbocharged intercooled
Transmission: AMG enhanced driver-adaptive electronic 5-speed automatic [or 6-speed manual]
* Electronic Stability Program
* Active Body Control
* Smart Key [thief-proof]
* Parktronic [sensors to assist driver in parking]
* Hand-free Surround-sound Centralized Phone System
* Keyless Go [car senses driver with Smart Key and automatically unlocks when driver touches the door, hood, or compartment]
* Distronic Adaptive Cruise Control [senses vehicles ahead]
* Tele Aid [24-hour Assistance Nationwide]
* SIRIUS Satellite Radio [commercial-free, with hundreds of CD-quality stations to choose from]

Celebrity Greeter of the Week

"Soy tan córneo esta noche. ¿Tu tiene gusto de ser mi esclavo?"

- Eva Mendes

[translation: "I am so horny tonight. Would you like to be my slave?"]